Not exactly…

Here is my favorite quote from a student in Biology class yesterday: “Professor, what are the cows mad about when they have that disease?”

everything old is new again…

Today I learned how to assemble and smoke a hookah. I learned this in my public speaking class. It was a “how to” speech. (duh) I was especially glad to learn about hookah smoking etiquette. I think today’s speaker did me a solid, because I surely would have annoyed those smoking a hooka with me, by not putting my finger over the hose while they were smoking, if it wasn’t for the etiquette lesson.

There is one thing that must be said for the Community College experience. It prepares you for a vast array of experiences.

lab

I’ve heard it said that most of education is agreeing on the definitions of terminology. There was a slight misunderstanding in Biology lab yesterday. A crustacean can exhibit agonistic behavior. It cannot, however, be agnostic. It’s a pillbull ok. (You know, potatoe bug, or roly-poly, just so we’re on the same page.) Apologies to very religious student at lab table 2 who took offense when our Prof said the pillbug was being agonistic. She wasn’t referring to its religious beliefs. They’re pillbugs. I don’t think they’re having that discussion.

number games

I packed up early for class this morning, it is quite snowy out. I packed my MacBook Pro, some new pens, my graph paper (I’m addicted) notebook, my Biology books, my i-pod, my kindle, and my seatbelt purse. I stopped at the coffee shop for a latte, got in my Volvo, and drove to school. All the things I “need” for a successful school day. In the middle of class I realized I had planned to meet a friend, who is adjunct at the same college I’m attending (I know, right?) for lunch. At break I pulled out my purse and said to my classmate sitting next to me “crap I forgot to stop at the atm this morning, I hope I have enough cash for lunch today if they don’t take a card”.

She looked at me and said “You have to pay for your lunch?”

Wow I just cannot get it through my head how blessed I am can I? I have to pay for my own lunch. That, in all seriousness, means I’m blessed. And when I get home there will be a paycheck in my mailbox for the work I did this week. That is a blessing folks. If you have to pay for your own lunch today, think about those who can’t, and even worse, think about those who won’t get a lunch today.

We wrapped up talking about deoxyribonucleic acid for organisms and moved into a discussion of the universe, (this link is VERY COOL, if you haven’t seen it. Disclaimer: expect to feel very tiny after watching). As class wrapped up & people left the room, I overheard one of my other classmates walk up to the Professor and say “Can I ask you a favor? I lost my wallet and I’m out of gas to get home today…”. Again with the reminder to be thankful. I also have gas to get home.

As I walked to the bookstore, I wanted to think more about structure and function of macromolecules but all I could contemplate was the blessing and curse that is money.

I snapped out of my thoughts and got in line. You have to check your book bag at the door in order to enter the bookstore. They have a guard to enforce this. I recognized the guy keeping track of the bags. We chatted for a minute and then he said to me “tell you what, since you are always smilin’ and brightening up my day, I’m gonna let you pick your own claim number today. I laughed and said great- I’ll take 44. He asked me why, and I said because it’s up front and it’s an even #. I like even #’s. He said “you know the problem with 4′s though- they always be jammin up the chamber. You should really just stick with a 9mm. You know what I’m saying?” Uh. That I should pick the 9 next time? He said “See- lucky number 9. You learn quick. Have a good day.”

I will tell you one thing, I learn something every day that I am here.

btw, Happy Friday the 13th.

Biology

I discovered a new building on campus. I had heard rumor of it, but had successfully avoided it until now. It’s called the “science building”. No really, it’s actually called that. I think they skipped out on the creative naming process so as to leave very little room for error when non-science majors, like myself, have cause to locate where to take Biology. Either that, or the major donor for the building had the last name of “Science”. This seems…unlikely.

I was lucky enough to fill out a new student information sheet. It is always interesting to me what the Professors want to know. Some want to know where you were born, who you love, if you eat meat and your political affiliation. Others barely memorize your name. This Professor asked a logical question for a science class. When was the last time you took a science class and what class was it? Let me see. That would be Biology. cough, cough in 1986.

I got to know everyone in my Biology class right away. That is because the young man who walked into class late and wandered around making a scene trying to figure out where to sit, decided he would really like to sit in the seat I was already occupying. Which he announced to the class. All of whom turned to look at me. I was momentarily tempted to say “but his name isn’t on the chair…”. I didn’t. You know, I’m not against the “occupy” movements, but I hadn’t really planned on starting one in Biology either, so I readily offered to move. At which point he changed his mind and looked at me and said: “No, never mind honey, you keep it. I’ll just sit next to you”. Uh. ok. So I guess we’ll be lab partners now. I hope it goes alright. His only question to the teacher so far was “Wait- do we have to touch bugs in this class?”.

Things are looking a bit iffy for me in Biology.

simplify

A handful of the guys in my Social Problems class came here to the college from a Detroit inner-city childhood. They make up a good portion of our football team. They are amazing. I mean, they are good at football, but what is amazing about them is how bright and informed they are about the world. We have had some great debates and a couple of them have some outstanding ideas about what is wrong with our country and how to fix it. In particular they like to discuss poverty, education, racism, and single parent households. I sure do wish you could hear them. The other thing about them that has turned out to be helpful, is their ability to cut to the chase when needed. One gentleman in particular can stop an argument cold. On this particular day another student brought up watching Ann Coulter, and our gentleman responded simply. With this:

“Ann Coulter? Really? huh. That bitch is crazy.”

Enough said.

this really happened

Ok sometimes I have made stuff up. Not this time, but sometimes. (and not on this blog, so don’t worry) My Psychology Prof is one of the more interesting and intelligent people I have come across at Community College. She has overcome some staggering disadvantages in her own life, and while she has clearly learned from her trials, she does not use them as an excuse and she does not cut herself any slack because of them. Consequently she expects a lot out of us as well, but she is willing to do anything it takes to make sure we are successful. Part of what she clearly believes about education is that we should cover as much as possible in as much detail as possible. So we started at the beginning while talking about the biology of brain development. By the beginning I mean conception. On this particular day we were having “volunteers” go up to the board and recap our reading by showing the class on the female reproductive diagram what happens. We had covered fertilization and were moving on. A young male classmate of mine went up to the board and used the pointer for his explanation. And I quote: “…and then the fertilized egg travels down the fellatio tube…”.

A few of us started to giggle. Kind of shockingly few, now that I think of it. (Maybe 8-10 out of 30something) The corners of my Professors mouth turned up and she looked down and to the side for a moment and then carefully said “We’re just going to pronounce that Fallopian”.